


Safe Haven

by killerweasel



Category: It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
Genre: Alternate Universe, Gen, Zombies
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-03-12
Updated: 2014-03-12
Packaged: 2018-01-15 12:38:13
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 607
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1305139
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/killerweasel/pseuds/killerweasel
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Charlie has a plan to survive the zombie apocalypse.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Safe Haven

Title: Safe Haven  
Fandom: It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia  
Characters: Charlie Kelly, cast of It's Always Sunny  
Word Count: 573  
Rating: R  
Warnings: zombies  
Summary: Charlie has a plan to survive the zombie apocalypse.

Charlie sank back on the lawn chair with a groan. Every single part of him was sore. Even his hair hurt. He'd been working his ass off for the last three hours, making sure everyone was completely secure. Coming to the Wal-Mart during the zombie outbreak had been his idea and there was no way in hell he was going to let it blow up in his face like so many of his other ideas did.

The rest of the Gang were sitting on the floor nearby, looking totally shell-shocked. That was understandable because the thought of an actual zombie apocalypse was a little hard for anyone to take. They'd wanted to barricade themselves in Paddy's until this all 'blew over'. Charlie had seen more than enough zombie movies to know that it wasn't a great idea to be tapped in a building which mainly had booze and pretty much nothing else.

Maybe it hadn't been very nice to chase the rest of the customers out of the store with his rat stick and a machete he'd found in the camping aisle while screaming like a deranged lunatic (he almost felt sad for the mothers with the crying children), but less people meant more supplies for everyone else. If everyone stayed calm and no one went totally nuts, they would have enough food and water to last for a few months.

Charlie wasn't interested in being in charge. He'd leave that up to Frank or Dennis (he really hoped that the two of them wouldn't end up killing one another because that would be not fun and he'd feel bad for a while afterwards). He was very good at bashing rats and a zombie was just a really big rat. He was also good at conserving food from years of not having very much money. While he probably could have taken the Wal-Mart for himself, he wanted to be with his friends. Being with people who sometimes cared about him when they felt like it was still better than being alone.

He tried not to think about the Waitress. He'd tried to get her to come with them, but she'd shoved him away. The second time he’d grabbed her, she’d slapped his face, saying she would ‘rather be with the zombies than with him’. The words had hurt more than slap. Then he'd lost sight of her in the crowd of people and zombies. Maybe she'd made it somewhere safe and he could rescue her when things were a little less insane.

Charlie lifted up his gore-splattered machete and wiped it off on his already ruined shirt before sliding it into the sheath on his belt. Who knew you could normally buy something this awesome for less than ten dollars? With a sigh, he rose to his feet. He could feel his body shaking from exhaustion. What he really wanted to do was fall asleep. Charlie knew he should at least eat something first and maybe get cleaned up. He sniffed himself. Zombie guts stunk worse than flooded sewers.

He staggered across the floor, wincing as new aches and pains added to the ones he already felt. Charlie was passing by the Gang when Mac reached out and grabbed his wrist. Mac squeezed Charlie's arm gently before giving him a ghost of his usual smile. Charlie nodded, patting Mac on the shoulder.

As long as they all stuck together, everything would be fine.


End file.
